ENGL 200 D: Reading Literature: Literature in the Marketplace

I really like the authors you chose to use. They have an interesting connection of spending of tangible and intangible (i.e. larger amounts or credit) money. I think it would be interesting to explore this relationship especially in terms of what is valuable to them. Your introduction can benefit from introducing the authors and their point of view, along with developing the ideas you already have. I feel it would be interesting to have a completely different paragraph to talk about what is money and what isn’t money. At the end of your Smith paragraph it is confusing about how you relate credit back to money. Lastly, your conclusion brings up other ideas that aren’t in your paper, and are a little unclear without explanation.

It seems like you are opting out in your last paragraph when you say that the question cannot be answered. This is certainly not powerful for your argument. Also, you say a few times in your paper that “people think” in one way or another. It would be stronger for you to just say your ideas outright. Take credit for your thoughts. Also, I can see lots of quotations in your paper. Be sure to lead up to them properly in order to set the reader up for how you are going to use Stein’s and Defoe’s words to defend your claim.

For your claim, I see you saying that money is viewed differently between people, however I don’t see evidence of this past your discussion of Stein’s text. I am not sure how you are comparing Defoe’s explanation to Stein’s. They are both certainly talking about credit. Are they talking about credit in the same way? Are you comparing or contrasting these texts with one another?

Just a formatting issue, but I think that the margins need to be 1″ all the way around. Right now you have it set at 1.25″ left and right.

I feel as though you can be more focused on one idea in your essay. you say that money is difficult to use because of its interpretation, but you also say money is hard because of its value, then finally you say that the question cannot be easily answered. i think that if you focus on just one of those ideas then your essay will become much more clear. Your beginning paragraph was good and to the point, but the conclusion seems very generalized and open ended.